Job 16:4
“I also could speak as ye do: if your soul were in my soul’s stead, I could heap up words against you, and shake mine head at you.”
It is so easy to talk about someone and tell others what they need to do when you have never experienced what they are enduring. This is exactly what Eliphaz and his friends did to Job. They criticized Job’s spirituality and told him what they thought he needed to do when they had no idea as to the reason for his trial.
Job’s response to their criticism is classic. He said, “I also could speak as ye do: if your soul were in my soul’s stead, I could heap up words against you…” Job understood that they had no idea what was in his heart. He knew that they were looking from a critical view instead of a helpful one. These friends could have been a great encouragement to Job in the biggest crisis of his life if they had used their words to help instead of to destroy.
Every person will at some point in their life find themselves looking at a modern day Job. You always have to remember that it is easy to talk critically about someone when you don’t know the reason as to why God would allow heartache and tragedy to come their way. There are some guidelines you should follow whenever you find yourself looking at someone who is going through a tragedy in their life.
First, don’t judge! Just because you think you know the reason someone is going through something doesn’t make it fact. You are human, and humans don’t see the whole picture that God sees. What we think could be God’s judgment could be His attempt to strengthen someone. You may be right that God is judging someone, but you could also be wrong. You would be better to leave the judging to God and simply help the individual through their condition.
Second, treat those in hardship the same way you would want to be treated if you were in their shoes. The mistake Job’s friends made was that they didn’t consider that one day they would be judged in their trials the same way they judged him. I have tried to make it a policy in my life to treat others the same way I would want to be treated if I were in their shoes. When someone falls in sin, treat them the same way you would want to be treated if you fell in sin. When someone is going through battles, treat them the same way you would want to be treated if you were going through battles. Whatever trial others are facing, treat them the way you would want to be treated if you were in their shoes because one day you may go through what they are facing.
Third, use your words to encourage and not to accuse. The sad part about Job’s friends is that they could have been a great encouragement to him; instead, they added to his grief. It is easy to accuse others, but it is better to be the encourager who helps them through hardships. It is always better to be an encouragement to others because you don’t want to run those off who can encourage you when you go through hard times. Always remember that what goes around will come around. Be the constant encourager; you will never regret it.